Depzkwan's Blog

My Life's Passion


No significant Action

No Brain

No great Calculation

No Deal

No Emergency

No Freedom

No Gain

No Heaven

No Intelligent

No Jaw

No Kite

No Long

No Maintenance

No Nest

No Offside

No Peace

No Queue

No Rest

No Slippery

No Tight

No Useful

No Vet

No Winner

No Xxx

No Yummy

No Zinc

But who cares with these NOs??

Not see

Not taste

Not hear

Not speak

Not feel

But who cares with these NOTs?

Act badly

Bring wrongly

Call hysterically

Do badly

Eat gluttonously

Fall sickly

Get nothing

Have nothing

Inject nothing

Jump highly

Kill cruelly

Love worse

Miss anything

Near nobody

Opt nothing

Press everybody

Question anything

Run anywhere

Sad inside

Threat anywhere

Under pressure

Vein is narrow

Wish hopefully

Xxx… no

Yacht is still far

Zookeeper is better

But who cares with these verbs, adjectives, and nouns?


Want to dream something beautiful…

Emerge the bad things.

Get up…

Want to get something real…

Emerge the bad things.


To Sleep and

to Get up…

Nothing is better.

Which worse?

Which better?

Which further?

Which nearer?

Which useful?

Which useless?


Who cares the good thing?


Who cares the bad thing?


Who cares the best?


Who cares the worst?


Who cares the dream?


Who cares the real?


Who cares the verbs?


Who cares the adjectives?


Who cares the nouns?


Who cares the biggest?


Who cares the smallest?


Who cares the highest?


Who cares the lowest?


Who cares the nearest?


Who cares the furthest?


Who cares the heart?

Red or blue?

Well or hurt?





13 April 2007

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Come on Everybody!

Come on, everybody!

Shake your head! Or nod your head! Just follow your heart what you want to do! If your heart choose ‘Dugem’, so you can ‘shake your head’. If your heart choose ‘Rock ‘n Roll’, you can ‘nod your head’. Just do what Project-pop said… hehe…


It’s free here. You can do what you wanna do. Noone can prohibit you. BUT, REMEMBER!! You have to responsible what you will do.


Ok, I have to do it too to throw my burden out. It’s not easy. So, I need your help, guyz, no matter what people say.


They don’t know what I feel.

They don’t know what I’ve done.

They don’t know what I’ve sacrificed.

They don’t know what I’ve learnt.

Exactly, they know NOTHING.


Only pray to God I can solve the problem.

The problem was emerged because of me. So I’ve to give the problem to Him in order that He repairs the problem.

I read a sentence that I’ve to learn:

“Give your broken heart to God, then God will fix that broken heart”.

Is it amazing?? God is indeed amazing…


I, indeed, wasted time when I made an analyzed of love, but now I feel it works to make me think again. Think bout how I manage my feeling to someone and so on.


Hey, guyz!!! I’ve to conquer my thoughts of some unimportant things. Mmm, I don’t know why I’ve been really sensitive recently.


So, wake up, girl!!!

One man has been prepared for you…

The awesome special guy for you from God!

He will not hurt you, but make you happy.

He will not make you sad, but make you smile.

He will teach you everything without underestimate you.

God will be in the middle of you both!

Amen everybody!!!! Ameeeennn!!!

It will be happened when I have faith on it.



The pigeon will bring the heart to God. No one or nothing could alter the passion of love from God to me. So the love that I spread will fly away, God carry it until it arrived in someone’s heart. Someone that God believes he will be so appropriate and so really mean to me.


three hearts

Three hearts??

Yes. They are God, me, and my love.

God who gives the path, so I have to walk on myself until I found the one that He prepares for me.


the bandage of the heart

It’s like… Yah, I wanna say that lots of bandages are on my heart. Who can heal my heart? When are the bandages set free? The answer is to pray to God. He will heal my pain and agony.


Believe it!!!!


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what my heart and my head said about “u”

There’s something in your eyes When I look at u.

Actually those are not your eyes’ problem, but maybe my heart’s problem that makes it real.

I know that there are a lot of problems which you have to fix it by yourself, but why do you always reject my help?

Oh God, your smile also kills me softly. Your face always is in my head. I just miss your presence, that’s all.

Why is The tension so big to me, otherwise we don’t meet over last 4 months? I don’t know what it is called. I cannot create a beautiful words for you to make you like me more than just friends. I cannot act kindly to make you impress.

I don’t understand exactly what you want except you don’t wanna have a gf first as you said. But, until when?

If i say, i wanna be over now, maybe it is the biggest lying from my heart even though that is the best choice from my head. Why? Because my heart said that I’m not ready yet if you’re with another girl. On the contrary, my head said that i have to look for another guy and forget anything about you.

It is easy? Oh, come on! You must know the answer. If you know about this, what would you do?

Ah, geuslah, pasrah en ikhlas we nya. Kesel sorangan jadina.

intina aya di lagu “If You’re Not The One” na si akang Daniel Beddingfield tah..


(23 mar 2012)

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Would I tell u those words?

Tak ada 1 hari untuk merasakannya…

Tapi butuh beberapa hari untuk mengatakannya…


Seperti lagu Gil:

It’s easy to say, but so hard to do” ato

It’s hard for me, to say I love u… simple words are always though


Pertanyaannya adalah:

Would I tell u those words???”

Which ‘U’??”



Maybe I’m insane… u can tell that…

Maybe I’m an unimportant person for u… u can tell that…

Whatever u wanna say, just tell that…

It’s ur right to tell everything bout me…


But one thing u should know,

This heart don’t wanna go away from me eventhough I force it.

U know why?? I myself dunno a reason, so I try to ask u.


I remember one thing,

Does this thing go to U???


Je ne sais pas

Avez-vous un cœur à moi?


su mente es la mente

mi mente es mi mente

I myself still can’t force ur decision

 (tp biasanya klo pasrah sih decisionnya tak terduga..)


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That Person

It turned out that…
Maybe I take the wrong step again…
Maybe I choose the wrong person again…

How could be this happened again??

I thought, the journey just began…
The journey would come up with the new thing…
The journey would come up with the new world…

The result??
Ok, actually, there was no result yet…
But if I see the conditions is right now,
The result will be zero…

Maybe it’s better to not continue this tactic…
Maybe it’s better to not dive deeply…
Maybe it’s better to not go on…

But why…
That person has been doing something that I wanna know WHY
That person has been making me so curious

Til I wrote this feeling, I don’t have the answer…

There were 2 things that I got different from that person…
Since we’ve been knowing each other,
that person often SMILES, and
that person did something that seldom did

Ok, I don’t know
if those things could be an enough proof for me
to prove that that person, indeed, has a special feeling to me…

All things I know is, everything becomes blur
When I found something ‘weird’ inside there…



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I dunno whether U know

I dunno whether U know that mostly people don’t like u…
I dunno whether U know that mostly people mock u…
I dunno whether U know that although people are like that but I don’t think like them…
I dunno whether U know that although people are like that but I appreciate what u’ve done…

I know…
They just judge u due to ur cover…
They just judge u without looking the good part…
They just judge u without clear reason…

They don’t see ur sharp eye…
They don’t see ur great capability…
They don’t see how unique U are…

Ur cover is not as good as others,
I don’t find the bad thing of U yet…
I don’t find that u’ve hurt anyone yet…

I just find that U are a work-hard person…
I just find that U try hard to be better person…
I just find that U try to explore ur hobbies…

Maybe we both, indeed, don’t get to know each other (yet)…
But I dunno why,
it’s comfortable to me to not know each other further and deeper…

So, Yes,
I myself also look at U from ur cover
from the another side, the GOOD side…
I just wanna see the good side from U…

I seemed to be a naive person???

although u dunno this feeling,
BUT I myself hv my own reason…